Jason is doing the cha cha. In practice, Edyta decides Jason needs to be more comfortable dancing on his own, so she takes him to a freestyle dance class. He is easily a foot talle than everyone else in the class, but he does well, becuase he has a natural rhythm about him. I love their routine, as usual. His footwork is great, and his arms are good most of the time. He does much better on his than anyone else in this competition except Kristi, so it'll be interesting to see how everyone handles that. Len notes that she went a bit off-tempo, as does Bruno, Carrie Anne critiques the bit of awkwardness in his arms. He gets a bit lower than usual with a 8,8,8 for a 24.
Shannon and Derek are totally dating. And wow, they're not really trying to hide it either. Derek brings her flowers, they go to the beach and Derek dances with his shirt off and they roll around in the sand together. They're dancing the rhumba, hence the romantic set-up. I think Shannon does a great job with the dance. Her lines are getting a lot better, Derek is choreographing to her strengths, and they have genuine chemistry on the dance floor. I don't think it was her best, but she's improving so much each week that it almost doesn't matter. Bruno says that they were "sizzling," but tells her to work on to footsteps. Carrie Anne tells her to work harder, but praises her work ethic. I always feel so bad when Shannon gets a negative critique, because she takes it so hard.
Before their scores, Tom tells us that they will be celebrating their 100th show in 2 weeks, and it will included performances by Mel & Maks, Mario Lopez, and Apolo and Julianne!! Yay Apolo! Shannon's scores are 8s across the board, to tie them with Jason with a 24.
Marlee had a tough week last week. She and Fabian are learning the mambo, which is Fabian's favorite. Then the Fonz shows up to tell her how great her spirit is. She looks fantastic, but again, I think she missed a couple things, or stepped off of the beat at some point. Carrie Anne was a bit disappointed. Len tells her she is an insporation, and then tells her it was uncomfortable. Same with Bruno. They're disguising their critiques around praise for being deaf. She gets straight 7s for a 21.
Cristian and Cheryl are foxtrotting. They look fantastic in shades of pink, but the dance is not good. Cristian is concentrating too hard on the counting, and then when he stops doing that, he's missing steps. Cheryl does her best, but this is not one of their better ones.
Band! The lady is in orange spandex and a gold headdress this week. Len tells Cristian this was his best dance, and then threatens to "show his bum in the supermarket" if Cristian is in the bottom two this week. Bruno (and I) choose not to think about that, but unlike me, praises the dance. I really didn't think it was that good, especially the footwork, which both Bruno and Carrie Anne loved. Before the break, they show us a preview of the group country dance coming up tonight. It looks like absolute mayhem. I can't wait! After the break, Cristian gets three 9s for a 27. Boo. It was not better than Jason's dance.
Marissa is next, and she's doing the Viennese Waltz. They seem to have a great time together. During the dance (which I enjoyed very much), I finally realized why all of her dances looks so odd, which was probably very obvious to everyone else from, like, Week One. Her legs are so much shorter than his, so all of the strides he's taking are just too big for her, which I think accounts for the fact that a few times in this dance, it looks like she's running to keep up. They miss one hold, and their ending is very complicated and kind of wobbly, but overall I liked it. It also looked like the wardrobe department figured out how to dress Marissa, because she's wearing a dress that doesn't make her look like a tree stump. Aww, she and Tony are so excited. All three judges praise her, and she gets a 9,8,9 for a 26.
Kristi hung out with Tiger Woods this week. Yeah, I guess that's cool. She and Mark are doing a jive. They try to play up the fact that Kristi has club feet as a child to make it seem like she has a weakness. I don't buy it, ABC! She won Olympic gold on those feet, I think she can handle the disco ball trophy. They do an adorable jive and while Mark does more of the work than usual this week, they were fantastic. Carrie Anne gives them a standing O before they get to the critiques. She says it was her favorite dance this season so far. Len calls it a buffet and a "tasty smorgasboard of dance." Great word usage there. Bruno raves. I'm feeling a perfect score. And there it is. A 30. Mark lifts Kristi into the air, but stupid Samantha has to pull her down. They were just having fun!
Paula Abdul is there. I'm thinking she could be a potential contestant next year, if her other gig keeps losing viewers.
Mario thinks he can go head-to-head with Kristi. Not if she keeps dancing like that, you can't. He and Karina are doing the rhumba this week. They are dancing to, no joke, "Let's Get it On." I wonder how the other Mario (Lopez, and Karina's boyfriend) feels about this. Karina is wearing red underwear and what looks like half of a white sheet. Also, this is very uncomfortable, but let's just say that with his tight pants...you can clearly tell which way Mario dresses. And we'll leave it at that. The dance is almost unwatchably sexy. The crowd loves this one. Len, however, calls Karina a strumpet and Mario a gigolo. Oh, Len. Stop being old. Bruno puts us back on track by calling it "fabulous." Carrie says it was better than good sex. I could not make this shit up. Wow. They get a 9,9,10 (their first of the competition) for a 28.
But wait! We still have the rodeo-themed group dance yet to go! A personal theory of mine: most everyone looks hotter in a cowboy hat. The stars all prove it in this montage. Kristi is elected head of the sheriffs and Jason the head of the outlaws. He tells her that the town ain't big enough for the both of them. Kristi tries to stand up to him, but sadly for her, he just picks her up and throws her over his shoulder. Later on, he picks up Derek and fake-smashes him into the bar. This looks like so much fun. This dance is the funniest thing I've seen this week. For one, it is to "Cotton-Eyed Joe." Two, it's total chaos. Shannon flips Derek, Mark & Kristi do a lift I think I've seen in figure skating pairs competition, and they all do cartwheels. Jason rocks my socks, and he and Edyta do an incredible no-hands lift. I'll try to find it on YouTube, because it needs to be seen. Tomorrow someone has to go home, though. And it's getting hard to choose.
Top 3: Kristi, Mario, and Marissa
Bottom 2: Marlee and Cristian
Going home: I have no idea. I don't think Cristian has a fan base, but then Len had to go and make his threat. Marlee's too inspirational, so maybe Shannon?? I hope not.
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